moon the reaper

focusing on the fear, i notice that i fear being overwhelmed. especially physically. every time i move toward that kind of experience (through dance, drugs or sex, for example) i am met with the terrified possibility of anything happening, and happening before i can even notice or assess the situation. my inherent mistrust of my environment is seen clearly. "if the world really knew me, if i couldn't hide myself behind this capable mask, then..."

then what? the primordial boogie monsters? the sudden shock spreading through the masses (omg, she poos; call the press)... or the simple "let us eat the human for breakfast"? okay, more truthfully: that i wouldn't be able to find my way back. that i would find my way back and feel imprisoned in my body.

well, it's either worth the risk or it isn't. the whole 'letting go' aspect can also be exciting.

me < universe = balance