all things something else

i have been avoiding talking about all the feeling stuff for a while; my life's evolution, my purpose, my level of satisfaction about all things not dumpling. most of my life i have found value in processing my emotions, but right now i am finding value in the opposite. i feel better keeping busy. i do have time now to "figure something out" but i would rather not. i'm not sure it's the most valuable way to spend my time right now. i don't think i would benefit from mulling anything over right now.

or maybe i am just avoiding facing something. either way, i think i have tended to err on the side of dwelling for most of my life, so whatever. let it go for now. if there's an elephant in the room, it will probably still be there.

when the awesomes left last weekend and the smoke cleared, i discovered that a little bird left four squash in a bag for us. i roasted them last night; two to be blended up for the dumpling, two went into a nice soup last night with beef, onions, mushrooms, cumin, s&p, some freshly grated nutmeg and a touch of molasses. our sudden spring snow yesterday evening made it a good day for a stew like that.

snow was still falling this morning, making spring seem like a dream, or today like a nightmare. not a terrifying wake-up-screaming dealio, more like the depressing, repressive kind where you eat grey food and wake up feeling like you've been taken by the borg. but even with all this greyness, i can't keep still. i'm going to wash the basement floor and bake something with these seriously brown bananas. i've already unpacked my summer shoes because i DON'T CARE IF IT'S SNOWING IT'S STILL SPRING. WINTER IS NOT ALLOWED. thank you.